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Who Should Initiate In A Relationship?

Since the stone age, guys have initiated relationships by “clubbing” a woman.. on her head and dragging her back home. I wouldn’t say it’s much different these days with the only difference being the choice of weapon : alcohol.

Okay, back from my ranting land. – There has been a huge debate on whether girls should initiate more, whether they should pick up the ropes in eraning absolutely useless yet infinitely entertaining pick up lines, whether they should initiate asking for dates, or whether they should initiate popping the important questions in life or not.

In recent times, guys have been required or pressured by society to be the more initiative side in a relationship, especially when it comes to the small stuff like holding hands, kissing, bungee jumping (you wouldn’t believe it) and popping the question. This leads us to beg the million dollar monumentally important question..


Quite frankly, i don’t see the need to be bothered by such an issue as i am governed by this principle which i believe after you’ve read about it, would not only agree upon, but be left unaffected by who initiates what in a relationship anymore.

“Whoever initiates first is the more willing of the two.” – that’s my principle, and whoooa alright put down your flamethrowers, let me justify myself first. Whoever initiates first is the more willing of the two because it shows that he/she is willing to not be bothered by social conventionalism and instead be ruled by the only rule that makes sense : love. To love someone so much that you aren’t bothered by what others would think if you initiate first, whether it be an apology after a quarrel, the first time you both hold hands, or even the asking out on a date – the first person who initiates is the more willing.

To Hell With Conventionalism And Social Pressures!

In fact, if i could rearrange and influence the minds of everyone in this world (a reason you should facebook like this post), i’d change the scenario to not a question on who should initiate first, but who gets to initiate first. Everyone should be rushing to initiate in a relationship as conventionalism and social pressures only serves as a barrier of pride and conformity to truly letting yourself fully love someone (:

Now, Hold That Hand!

Well, if you’ve been hesitating to be the first to hold that hand in your relationship, or to kiss that kiss, then after reading this, you should be convinced enough to seize snatch the initiative and go make that first move. It only proves you are the more willing, the more loving, and the one putting in more effort in relationship – something you can use as leverage in the future (HEH.) 

How To Get A Girl / Guy To Do What You Want

You’ve been there, the quarreling, the compromising, the flipping of coins and sometimes, the flying kicks – all to get a decision to go your way. Decision making is a huge part of our love lives and it doesn’t always go our way. But wait! It doesn’t always to happen that way. Here’s an ancient trick passed down from Ghandi himself on how to get a girl / girl to do what you want. -winks.

Either, Or

It’s called the “Either, Or” principle. It works by helping them assume that they have already made a decision in your favor and all that’s left is in which way they would want to carry out that favor. Here’s an example of how this works. I would ask, “Hey there sexy (don’t use this greeting), would you like to catch either Iron Man 2 or Ip Man 2 with me this weekend?” – See, i’ve already helped the sexy girl i like make the decision of watching the movie with me this weekend, it’s just whether she wants to watch Iron Man 2 or Ip Man 2 (Ip man would totally kick Iron Man’s ass, btw).

So You Think You Can Pick Up Megan Fox?

Well, actually, no you can’t. This tactic does not guarantee you a 100% chance of getting a date or getting a decision to go your way, but it increases your chances hugely of getting a decision to go in your favor. So, the next time you want to suggest doing something – SKIP THAT PART, simply suggest 2 options you’d like to do which are subsets of what you originally wanted to do in the first place. (:


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